Likely, we all have pains of the heart that are still unsettled. Regardless of faithful prayers, Jesus simply hasn’t fixed a thing.

 

There have been times when my heart pleaded so earnestly with God to fix “this or that” yet to date it still lingers as a deep wound unbound and seemingly unattended.

 

I, like most of you, have screamed, threatened to quit all manner of ministry, and have even tried in desperation to manipulate the God of Heaven.

 

It doesn’t work.

 

I have led support groups while in my own agony. I’ve walked onto platforms, silencing my own pain. I’ve leaned into wearily long hours for the freedom of others while waiting on my own.

 

Please don’t be shocked, here. It seems consistent with those in the Word of God, too. It might be a good study for your dear heart as well.

 

The Lord has had to come to nudge me out of many dark caves when I all but refused to come out of hiding.

 

He has sent me hearts in need right when I’ve decided that I’m done-letting me know that I am not.

 

He has sent creation to testify to me of His watching when I’ve felt unseen, and He has breathed new songs for hurting hearts out of my own despair.

 

My pen from Heaven is wrought with pain. Years come and go, and some things are simply still not fixed.

 

Not one of my tantrums has changed the heart of God. Yet, He has always come running to my pain. When I’ve thought that I could not endure one more day, He took His gentle rod and pushed me onward again. When the grief has taken over my body, and I’ve been too tired to get up again, He sent His very breath to offer me a fresh wind. When my tears wouldn’t cease and the sting of pain was so overwhelming, He came and brushed my hair as He sang, “Hush little baby, don’t you cry…” over me.

 

In every moment He has been near to me. Never once have I been left alone by Him.

 

Despite all that remains unfixed, He has used every ounce of it to give life to others. To offer courage to others. To push other little birds from a pained nest.

 

At the end of the day, I’ve had to learn to trust Him in all things and in all seasons.

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I trust you, Jesus, in every pain

And when you’ve chosen it to remain

When all I want is it to go

I know you’re forging precious gold.

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Maybe you, today, have much that is still undone. Maybe you also have pleaded with Heaven for God to remove the cup. I have to0.

 

Yet, I suspect there is a magnitude of purpose that is still unseen when God has, yet, to fix it…