Have you ever grieved past seasons of life? I found myself this week reminiscing much.

 

It’s not that I don’t love where Christ has me today. But I do remember vividly the times He called me onward. This always meant I had to leave some familiar faces behind.

 

I remember when He called me to resign a great job with great people who had become my extended family. It took almost a month of grieving the “loss” while I simultaneously walked into the “gain.”

 

Let’s face it. Change-changes things. It changes the closeness of relationships, the focus of each day’s routine , and sometimes even physical locations.

 

In other seasons I found myself with some less and others more,and quite honestly, while excited to see what Christ wanted to do in the new season….I always felt the grief of the old season. It was never far from my heart.

 

To this day…it still isn’t.

 

I’m the girl that had white knuckles holding onto the familiar faces and trying to drag everyone along for the ride. Rarely did it work like that in God’s economy of things.

 

I would have to learn unfamiliar things, make new friends, and trust Him in the transition. Can we just be honest? It’s hard.

 

I have a particularly loyal heart. This can be good and bad all at the same time. The heart will want to “stay” when Christ is saying “go.” It can cause quite an internal war.

 

If I could put my finger on one of the hardest things for me about following Christ, it would likely be this very thing.

 

Those who know me well know this about me. They’ve come to expect it in transitions. While joy bubbles up…often so does grief.

 

Mainly, because I know the signs. I can usually discern the shift now and I’ve come to understand the cost of following Christ can be steep.

 

We have long talks about it when a particular wave of grief passes thru my heart. He sees.

 

I am reminded of His own walk here on earth and the times he must have felt the sting of the assignment. It meant he couldn’t stay some places too long or go some places with the gang. He had a mission and it had to be fulfilled.

 

So if you are in a transitional season with Jesus. It’s ok to grieve the shift. He understands.

 

But do make sure you continue forward. Don’t look back for too long yearning for what was.

 

If you do, you might miss what is…